bglewandowski

Joined Atlas Obscura in 2016

Brian Gerard (Lewandowski) writes books critics call "aggressively adequate"—better than "aggressively terrible" but somehow more concerning. He once traded a MetroCard for a pitchfork on a subway platform and now uses it exclusively for dramatic pointing. He lives on a farm outside Charlottesville, Virginia, which consists of three disappointed potted plants and a pig named Trouble McFussbucket who serves as his harshest critic. His wife just smiles politely. The plants have given up entirely. His first manuscript was composed entirely of punctuation marks and confused sketches. One editor called it "what would happen if Finnegans Wake had a stroke." He's since published "Not Bukowski" (poems that don't rhyme, because discipline is hard) and "Slop and Swell from a Festering Mind" (essays so concerning that bookstores check on his well-being). His debut novel, "Otter Boy," is forthcoming, assuming he resists replacing the manuscript with semicolons and otter doodles before deadline. He also just released another collection of shorts called "The 10-Items-or-Less Apocalypse." You can find them all on Amazon and at other fine literary establishments. Brian once spent three hours photographing a rare bird that was actually a plastic bag. The bag hasn't returned his calls. His photos have graced both the Smithsonian and several Post Offices—the wanted posters captured his good side. He's the only person banned from church bake sales for "weaponized brownies" (cocoa powder in a Ziploc). He called it avant-garde. The pastor's wife called the authorities. The authorities declined. Inheriting humanism from Steinbeck, absurdism from Vonnegut and Adams, sprawling narratives from Irving, and weaponized failure from Moore, he writes about conflicted everymen suddenly struggling through supernatural chaos—scenarios he understands intimately, since his entire life feels like someone else's fever dream he's forced to live through sober. He does his best writing where people can't escape: DMV waiting rooms, his car in Target parking lots, and Scottish castles when someone else is paying. His characters are clever and fearless. Brian remains unconvinced that birds aren't surveillance drones.

bglewandowski.com

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Places I've been

Places this traveler has marked as been there.

Arthur Ganson's work on display at the MIT Museum. (Press Photo)

Permanently Closed

Cambridge, Massachusetts

MIT Museum: Arthur Ganson

Bouncing, delightful, mechanical art at the MIT Museum.

Cambridge, Massachusetts

Modica Way

An alley way dedicated to graffiti and street art is a constantly changing street gallery.

Hull, Massachusetts

Georges Island

Civil War Fort on an island in the Boston Harbor.

Hull, Massachusetts

The Murder Holes of Fort Warren

Civil War-era Fort designed to withstand invasion and attack, with tricky traps called "murder holes."

Sandwich, Massachusetts

Sandwich Glass Museum

This delicate museum is devoted to the art and industry that once supported Cape Cod's oldest town.

Flanders, New York

Big Duck

A former poultry store that looks like a giant duck and is one of the "seven wonders" of Long Island.

Newport, Rhode Island

Newport Cliff Walk

Three and a half miles of cliffs, rocky beaches, Gilded Age mansions and 40 Steps to nowhere in particular.

Permanently Closed

Worcester, Massachusetts

Higgins Armory Museum

Once a private collection, now the only museum of arms and armor in the Western Hemisphere - CLOSED.

Birmingham, Alabama

Statue of Vulcan

A 56-foot tall statue of the god of fire looks out over Birmingham, Alabama.

Lincoln, New Hampshire

The Basin

Even Henry David Thoreau found this glacial pothole irresistible.

Sullivan, Missouri

Meramec Caverns

400 million-year old limestone caverns nestled in the Ozarks served as shelter and a hideout for cultures throughout North American history.

Permanently Closed

Graniteville, Vermont

Rock of Ages Granite Quarry

Tour the world's largest deep-hole dimension granite quarry, where you can view the plant where gravestones are made and roll a ball down the outdoor granite bowling alley.